Recently, I spoke with someone who had been holding space for a person processing some deeply painful and difficult things. “Holding space” means sitting with someone in their deepest pain, grief, or confusion without judgment or hurry.  It’s creating a temporary refuge where a person can be totally honest, really messy, and feel safe while doing so. 

This holding space kind of work doesn’t just happen in formal settings like at a hospital or doctor’s office, in a counseling session with a therapist, or in a church service with a minister.  It happens in the quiet, ordinary days of our lives where we are often called to hold space for someone… Space for the grieving friend dealing with the emotions of losing a loved one. Space for the one with the unexpected diagnosis. Space for the one with a marriage in trouble. Space for a parent of young children feeling overwhelmed. Space for aging parents who are grieving the loss of their health and independence. Space even for our  “strong friends”  you know, the ones who faithfully care for everyone else. 

Holding space can be sacred work. But let’s be honest, it can also be incredibly heavy. Sitting with someone else’s pain takes a toll on our own hearts. The truth is,  Jesus will sit in that space with us.  We may hold space for others, but we were never meant to hold the full weight of what they are carrying. “Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.” (1 Peter 5:7 NLT) 

There comes a point when we have to take what has been entrusted to us and entrust it to Him. We can listen, love, pray, and be present but ultimately, we place that person and their pain into hands much stronger than ours.

Psalm 55:22 reminds us, “Give your burdens to the LORD, and he will take care of you.” We don’t have to solve every problem or carry every outcome. We can  hold space for someone for a season or a moment and allow Jesus to hold both of us.

The Lord has encouraged me to look for the space holders. The ones who stop and quietly listen, who faithfully show up when needed, and who often carry the weight of others. Even the strongest shoulders grow weary. They may secretly be longing  for someone who will simply let them be heard and receive care themselves. Reach out with a  kind note or word, a prayer, or a simple question,  “How are YOU doing?” And if needed … be a space holder for them. Galatians 6:2 (NLT)  “Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ.” 

We are called to both carry and be carried. Wherever today finds you, I pray your “space” is filled with the peace and comfort of The Father.