The past month I’ve been roaming around the Old Testament – just wondering around from place to place ya know.

Along my journey I got stuck in Deuteronomy. I got stuck right where the Israelites got stuck.

Man, it’s easy for me to judge them – to cast shame on them for not totally trusting God. It’s easy to say that I would never. That I would never ever.

But y’all let’s be real – we are just as human as they were, and we fail just as much – if not more.

Their lack of trust landed them hoofing through the wilderness for way too long.

Their lack of trust boils down to disobedience y’all. When God tells you to turn left, but you turn right that’s disobedience. When God tells you to take a step but you stand still. Disobedience.

So we have a choice guys – we can do what God is telling us to do. No matter how scary. No matter how daunting it seems. Or we can choose to wonder around aimlessly in the wilderness.

You will feel unsettled.

You will feel unfulfilled.

You will feel unsatisfied.

So like the Bible says you can make your plans all you want to, but until you follow God’s path for your life you will be in a constant GPS reroute.

That annoying little GPS voice isn’t going to stop until you’re back on the right track.

How do you want to live today? Unsettled or certain.

It’s your choice.

In their hearts humans plan their course, but the LORD establishes their steps. Proverbs 16:9

Well, it’s February and there is certainly no shortage of things to celebrate this month: Black History Month, Presidents’ Day, and last, but not least, Valentine’s Day.

Ah, Valentine’s Day. The day where we set aside special time for our forever Valentine – maybe a new outfit, maybe a romantic dinner, or maybe just some peace and quiet at home with your beloved.

Or, maybe you’re waiting for your forever Valentine, and so you’ve joined the ranks of the ever popular GALentine’s Day! Maybe a spa day, a shopping day and a loud, rambunctious dinner at your favorite, local spot – some much needed and appreciated gal time.

Yes, it’s Valentine’s Day and love is in the air, friends.

And, listen I want you to know right up front that I am here for ALL of it! I love it when my hubs and I can steal a few hours away together – I don’t care what we’re doing! We can be at Lowe’s shopping for shelving, at a movie sharing popcorn, or at dinner, reconnecting and discussing our lives. And, Valentine’s Day is one of those times for us. We’ve sort of nixed the idea of gifts for Valentine’s Day, and are just thankful for time. Time to remember our first Valentine’s Day, that Valentine’s Day where the cake fell on the floor (true, sad story) and all the others in between. We love to think back over our life together, to discuss how much we’ve grown as individuals and as a couple, and to do a little dreaming for our future. Yep, I love Valentine’s Day with my man.

And, don’t get me started about my gals! Listen, no kidding, I am so thankful for my friends! They are my support system, my sanity and my favorite sitcom, all at the same time! My closest friends have been with me through thick and thin, the good, the bad and the ugly, and are still brave enough to answer the phone when I call. I honestly don’t know where I would be in life without the friends God has placed in my life and, thankfully, I won’t have to find out for a long time.

So, these Valentine’s Day celebrations are all great, but lately, God has been stirring my heart with a different kind of love: love for others. Now, before you nod and zone out, let me be clear: I’m not talking about loving your husband, your kids, your parents, your best friends, or your crazy Aunt Jo, who always brings Orange Fluff to family gatherings. I mean, even people who don’t know God at all love their friends and family. No ma’am, I’m talking about loving the others – you know the ones. The hard ones to love, the ones who get on your proverbial last nerve, the ones who you find strange, the ones you don’t understand.

I don’t know who these people are for you; maybe it’s that crazy neighbor that you see in the grocery store and immediately turn and go the other way. Maybe it’s that coworker that’s on the other side of the political aisle from you, maybe it’s that acquaintance that goes to THAT church, or, God forbid, doesn’t go to church at all. Yep, those people.

God has brought me over the last few weeks to a crowd favorite, I Corinthians 13. Now, here’s a fun fact about I Corinthians 13: even though most of us probably had at least a portion of this chapter read at our weddings, where we were so in love with our soon-to-be spouse that we couldn’t even see straight, this chapter is not about romantic love at all. Nope. The context in which Paul wrote this “love chapter” had nothing to do with the love between a husband and wife, nor was it about loving your family or friends. Believe it or not, Paul wrote I Corinthians 13 to some Christians in Corinth who weren’t loving each other and/or their communities well. Kinda changes the meaning, doesn’t it?

Paul was trying to remind the Corinthians that, for the Believer, love shouldn’t be given or expressed only when others meet your standard of behavior, agree with you on everything or you feel they are worthy of your love – Believers’ love should be given unconditionally. Just like God’s love.

Wait, what? Yeah, I know. It’s tough. But the truth is, love is messy. It doesn’t always make sense and it certainly isn’t at all easy. What Paul was trying to say is this: loving others means dying to yourself – your needs, your wants, your preferences.

Here’s I Corinthians 13:4-8a from my favorite translation:

Love is large and incredibly patient.

Love is gentle and consistently kind to all.

It refuses to be jealous when blessing comes to someone else.

Love does not brag about one achievements nor inflate its own importance.

Love does not traffic in shame and disrespect, nor selfishly seek its own honor.

Love is not easily irritated or quick to take offense.

Love joyfully celebrates honesty and finds no delight in what is wrong.

Love is a safe place of shelter, for it never stops believing the best for others.

Love never takes failure as defeat, for it never gives up.

Love never stops loving.

Um, ouch. I don’t know about you, but I don’t even love my husband that well sometimes! I mean, that is a crazy kind of love!

Love is a tall order, for sure. So, why is this kind of love important, you ask? Because this is the kind of love that God loves us with. As Paul explained to the Corinthians, it’s our responsibility and sacred honor to represent God well to everyone, but especially to those who don’t know Him yet. God’s love is what changes things – hearts, minds, lives. If we are going to win the world – the lost, the broken, the hurting, the abandoned, the deceived, the confused – we must allow this crazy kind of love – God’s love – to shine like a beacon from our heart to theirs. We have to, there is no other option.

So, how about you? Are you loving the difficult people in your life well? If you’re like me, sometimes yes, other times no. But I Corinthians 13 and Valentine’s Day is always a good reminder. As you celebrate and enjoy each other today, ask God to help you love like He loves. Then, sit back and watch God’s love spread like crazy!

What if we fail with grace?

Failure. I may be alone in this feeling but here lately I feel like I fail way more than I succeed. So, I decided to take a step back and really look at that. To really examine this season on failure in my life and dig into what’s really going on here.

The first thing I look at is how am I failing? Am I failing and just staying in that pit of failure or am I failing with grace? Failing with Grace??? Trish, what are you saying? Do you even hear your self? Failure is not something most people relate in any way shape or form with grace BUT – what if we did?

What if instead of, “Oh look at her. She is failing as a wife, or mother, or daughter,” or whatever we can fail at and thinking, “Maybe if she had not been so lazy, so moody, so whatever she was to cause the failure this could have gotten worked out. If she had just tried harder then this wouldn’t be her story.”

What if instead of throwing shame and judgement at someone in their season of failure we looked at them and thought, “Wow. God must be doing something big in her heart or life! I should encourage her through this difficult season.” Maybe if we would see these rough seasons as an opportunity to grow in grace instead of a scarlet letter across the person’s chest our BIG God would show up and do BIG works – only in that person’s life and heart but in ours as well.

In 2 Corinthians 12 Paul is talking about his weaknesses. He is talking about his own failures. It goes on to say that he pleaded with the Lord not once, not twice, but three times to remove this shortcoming from him. The Lord’s reply to him is what brings me back to this idea of failing with grace. The Lord said to Paul, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Paul goes on to say how he will go on boasting in his weakness so that the power of Christ will rest upon him.

This is where I get the idea about failing with grace and that grace is where I should land in seasons like the one I find myself in. I should not try to hide my failure but instead be honest about it because in my weakness He is strong.

I think so many of us come up short in this day and age. We find ourselves failing at trusting, at loving others, at life in general. Shoot, don’t think I haven’t forgotten to pick my kid up from practice recently. My mind has been a cloud of fog, and I have dropped so many balls. It’s not just you guys. We are all in this together. We find ourselves losing left and right, and just can not grasp why this is happening to us.

I think that maybe we are missing out on the grace that comes with learning from our hard seasons. The grace that comes with trusting someone else with our truths and watching God use people in our lives that we never would have expected. I think that if we choose to see the good in not only our shortcomings – but those of others as well – instead of using them as some form of perch to put our selves on, that God will show up in our lives and the life of someone else big time.

So maybe you’re in a rough seasons with me – maybe you’re not. Maybe you’re out living your best life, but you know someone who is struggling. Maybe this is when we choose to FAIL WITH GRACE. Maybe this is where we allow God to use us to encourage someone else to fail with grace. Whatever the case may be with you guys I truly believe that in the end grace, kindness, and love will dominate the story. So, lets choose our response to failure wisely. Fail. With. Grace.

But he said to me, “my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weakness, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong. -2 Corinthians 12:9-10

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. – Romans 8:28

To my sister in suffering…

I don’t know why our Father God would allow this to happen.  I hurt with you.  My soul is grieved right beside you; tears streaming with you.  I am here for you, and our heavenly Father is still here comforting us through the Holy Spirit – giving us an anchor of inexplicable peace in the face of panic, uncertainty, and pain.

I do know He will use this pain.  He will use it to draw us close into His bosom and heal us.  He will use it to adjust our perspective, because in the face of loss and pain the worries we were consumed with yesterday just don’t matter. He will use it to burn away the selfishness and sinful desires that tried to consume our thoughts and time.  He will use it for His good purpose.

The honest desires of my heart are still for comfort, security, and even pleasure…. But are those God’s desires for me? Is that what life is about? Maybe He uses the pain and suffering to refine our hearts so we will finally desire what is truly good.  It shows us there is something better than comfortable, that security is a mirage, and true joy is only found in His presence.  

In this moment of suffering we could choose to let anger and bitterness consume us- to let them ravage our souls and build a wall around our hearts.  We could choose to despair, to sit in this place of loss.  Over the hours, waves of anger, grief, and depression pour over me.  But deep in the foundation of my soul I know the truth.  He is faithful. Even now.  

“Those who possess Gospel life have a God-directed worship reflex in the midst of suffering.”  

– Wade Grubbs

Father you created us.  You know our hearts are weak.  You know we don’t understand.  We are trying to trust you, but it is hard for our simple minds. It is so hard to understand that loss and pain can be part of your good purpose.  It is so hard to understand that you let sin and evil rule this world.    But Your ways are higher than our ways and we know enough to trust your hand.  Father, help our unbelief.  Help us trust you.  Help us open our hearts again to you, because without you we truly are nothing but in your presence we have everything.  Help us to pick up our heads, to breathe in and out, and to stand up again.  

Thank you that we do not suffer in vain.  Thank you for your hand of provision – showing us you are still here even in the midst of our confusion and pain.  You are the almighty but you still care for us and truly know our needs better than we know them ourselves.  I praise you, my sovereign King, in the middle of the storm because you still deserve all glory and as I sing to you even from pain and despair you fill me with peace.

1 Peter 1:3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His great mercy has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, 4 to obtain an inheritance which is imperishable, undefiled, and will not fade away, reserved in heaven for you, 5 who are protected by the power of God through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. 6 In this you greatly rejoice, even though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been distressed by various trials, 7 so that the proof of your faith, being more precious than gold which perishes though tested by fire, may be found to result in praise, glory, and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ; 8 and though you have not seen Him, you love Him, and though you do not see Him now, but believe in Him, you greatly rejoice with joy inexpressible and [d]full of glory, 9 obtaining as the outcome of your faith, the salvation of [e]your souls.

Our house can be… well, loud, and crazy, and hectic, and .. well LOUD lol. With four daughters that love to talk, a husband that loves to talk, and of course, then there is me (they get it honest).There is so much we have a lot to say about, and some things we can go on and on about.

Everything just rolls right off the tongue when we are happy, or being goofy, or venting, or in a disagreement (imagine that). But, when we are hurt… sad… scared… uncomfortable, well we tend to clam up. Yep, I went there. All of a sudden we are at a loss for words.

We don’t want to talk about it, or we won’t talk about it, or we don’t know how to talk about it.

What are the chances we do that with our Heavenly Father?

There are times when my prayers, praises, requests, and general conversation with HIM just roll off my tongue. I have watched where sweet souls that were hurting, heartbroken, scared, beat down, anxiety drenched- have just stopped praying, or won’t pray about those particular “thorns”, because they don’t know what to say or what to pray for. You been there?

I have… I’ve seen it and done it myself. I have been “at a loss for words”. I have cried, “God, I don’t even know what to say. I’m done, I’m broken, I don’t want to talk about it, I just can’t.”

And His reply is, “Child, you don’t have to have words. You don’t even have to know the words. You don’t even have to speak the words.” None of us like to admit when we are weak. Guess what? He knows we are weak.

His Spirit not only knows what to pray for and what to say that aligns with God’s will, but the Spirit prays for YOU and for ME with GROANINGS that words cannot express!

Groanings make inarticulate sound in response to pain or despair. Like wow. He PLEADS on our behalf! PLEADS! The word pleads means to make an emotional appeal.

Have you wrapped your mind and troubled heart around that? The HOLY SPIRIT, in the presence of our FATHER, makes an emotional appeal with deep groanings on our behalf for God’s will! Let that soak in. It’s ok to be at a loss for words, He knows all that needs to be said! He’s already there speaking for you. ❤

“And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don’t know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words. And the Father who knows all hearts knows what the Spirit is saying, for the Spirit pleads for us believers in harmony with God’s own will.” (Romans 8:26-27

One of my favorite women of the Bible is Queen Esther. What I admire most about Esther is her extraordinary strength. Despite feeling afraid, she still mustered up the strength to accept the assignment that she was destined for. Esther no doubt knew that real strength comes from God, and she allowed Him to work through her. Through faith, she found the courage to face her fears. From her humble beginnings to living in the lavish palace of the king, she remained true to herself, her family, her people, and her God. No doubt, Esther serves as an inspiring role model for women of all ages.

In a beautifully orchestrated plan, Esther was in the right place at the right time. Esther knew that she must face her fears and trust in God’s plan for her life, so she courageously stepped out in faith and obedience to accomplish the task laid before her. Queen Esther’s brave actions serve to show us that God uses ordinary people to do extraordinary things.

Maybe you, too, have felt like Esther. Remember when you experience “for such a time as this moments,” that He can and will turn pain into purpose and trials into blessings. What He calls you to do, He will help you accomplish…

“Perhaps you were born for such a time as this”

Esther 4:14

Did anyone else feel defeated before they even opened up that fresh, new 2022 planner?

Just me? Okayyyyyy.

For real though, the last week of December I thought about the long list of things I need to be better about doing [cough cough cooking] all while feeling the strong need to abort the mission before the mission even began.

Let me shoot straight with y’all – cooking is my least favorite adulty thing to do followed quickly by grocery shopping. Like I would rather scrub toilets. I’m just being honest.

Here’s the deal though – you can create new habits. It’s true.

You just have to do it. You have to want it more than you don’t.

How do I know? Because I’ve done it.

My entire life I was the opposite of a morning person. Ask my dad. I would hit snooze and scream five more minutes at my poor momma more than I care to admit.

But when I fell in love with God all of that changed. I knew that I needed to spend more time with Him, and I knew the quiet hours before anyone else in my house peeped their little eyes open would be my best bet.

So I prayed.

And I set my alarm early.

And I only hit snooze once.

And I got up.

And the next day I got up.

And the next day – I got up.

And now five years later I even set my alarm super early on my days off – even in the summer.

And I love every single minute of my time with God.

So I’m gonna keep praying about this cooking thing. And I’m gonna cook. And then I’m gonna cook again.

And my hope and prayer for you in this new year is that whatever that thing is that’s looming over you – telling you that you can’t – eventually becomes the thing that you can.

And I pray you fall in love with it.

No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. Therefore, strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees. – Hebrews 12:11-13